Monday, January 16, 2006

They go to an after-party; I stew in self-hate

The part of me that revels in awards shows withered and expired about the time Isaac Mizrahi (who?) referred to Charlize Theron's playing of Aileen Wuornos in Monster as a "scary dyke with no teeth." That was on the E! red carpet Golden Globes preshow, sorely missing the necessary tonic of Kathy Griffin.

Speaking of this Mizrahi f*ckwheat, he asks Hilary Swank: "Do you try to dress sexy since you're single now?" Uh, the Swank-n-Lowe "split" was announced just last week, and Swank replied with the proper peevishness, "No no no, I'm not single. I'm trying to work my marriage out." Celebrities, as a rule, must make concessions with their personal life, but none should be subjected to idiotic and insensitive questions like Mizrahi's. Also, he took it upon himself to prod Scarlett Johansson's breasts. Being gay does not give you a free pass to toss around "dyke" and grope women. I wish Johansson would've stood up for herself and slapped the sh*t out of him. All this ire before the show even started.

I guess it says something about the show that I'm still talking about before it when it is now, in fact, after it. It was a redundant, shockless night. Brokeback ruled, Ang Lee (above left, with Grizzle) further cemented the tenet that no foreigner can pronounce "Hollywood Foreign Press." Item: sincere thanks, Geena Davis, for parodying the self-importance of your industry with a great speech. Item: it's settled; Emma Thompson is my favorite person in the world.

In other news, Renée Zellweger and Ellen Pompeo (who?) are now indistinguishable from each other.

8 comments:

bagels, boobs, and beer said...

your girl emma's dress was pretty heinous, though.

J.J. said...

who cares, she's bloody fantastic

Write Or said...

Yo, when I click your links I get Yoon-jin Kim and Jaime Pressly. Not much of a resemblance there.

J.J. said...

remedied, for now. thanks

Beedow said...

don't you DARE say that about my Ellen. she's the most realistically beautiful woman on television. watch GREY'S ANATOMY this week and for all time.

J.J. said...

realistically beautiful? did you look at that photo? lay off the sauce, stritchy.

Write Or said...

Just read on cnn.com that Mizrahi will be groping it up at the Oscars too. I like his fashion designs, but is that enough for me to put up with his offensive red carpet antics?

Probably.

J.J. said...

I fail to understand many things.